Chuck Norris once ran a marathon backwards just to see what second place looked like.

Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.

Chuck Norris can grill a steak by staring at a cow.

Chuck Norris once wrestled a bear, an alligator, and a mountain lion all at once. He won using only his left pinky.

Chuck Norris can swim on land.

Chuck Norris's password is the last 9 digits of pi.

A shark was once bitten by Chuck Norris. It now walks on land out of fear of going back in the water.

Chuck Norris can eat just one Pringles chip.

Chuck Norris can make a Happy Meal cry.

Chuck Norris won a chess tournament using only pawns.

Chuck Norris once won a staring contest against the sun.

Chuck Norris once stared at a chameleon. The chameleon spent the rest of its life looking like Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not need a debugger. Bugs confess on their own when he opens the IDE.

Chuck Norris's internet connection is never slow. The internet speeds up when it senses him.

Chuck Norris can score a goal in soccer using a bowling ball.

Chuck Norris can hit a home run with his bare fist.

Chuck Norris does not pet animals. Animals pet themselves when they see him coming.

Chuck Norris once rode a bull for nine seconds. The bull is still in therapy.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

Chuck Norris once bowled a perfect 300 game with a golf ball.