Technology

Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.

Chuck Norris's computer has no delete key. Chuck Norris never makes mistakes.

Chuck Norris can uninstall a virus by staring at the screen.

Chuck Norris's password is the last 9 digits of pi.

Chuck Norris does not need a debugger. Bugs confess on their own when he opens the IDE.

Chuck Norris's internet connection is never slow. The internet speeds up when it senses him.

Chuck Norris can access the internet without a connection. The internet comes to him.

When Chuck Norris writes code, the compiler apologizes for any warnings.

Chuck Norris can upload files to the cloud by throwing his laptop into the sky.

Chuck Norris does not need a GPS. He tells the road where to go.

Chuck Norris can delete the recycling bin.

Chuck Norris can text from a payphone.

Chuck Norris can finish Mario Bros without pressing any button. The game finishes itself out of respect.

When Chuck Norris sends a message, he does not need a phone. The words find the person themselves.

Chuck Norris can charge his phone by holding it really tight.

Chuck Norris can trip on a wireless connection.

Chuck Norris does not Google things. Google Chuck Norris things.

Chuck Norris can overclock a microwave by yelling at it.

Chuck Norris can type on a keyboard with his fists and produce Shakespeare.

Chuck Norris does not need a smartphone. His brain already runs every app.

Chuck Norris can photocopy a mirror.

Chuck Norris can use Bluetooth in airplane mode.

Chuck Norris can charge a Tesla by staring at it.

Chuck Norris can print a document from a toaster.

Chuck Norris can install software by blowing on the disc.

Chuck Norris can hack a computer using only a pencil.

Chuck Norris can take a screenshot of his imagination.

Chuck Norris can send a fax from a banana.